nothing can defeat God

When I smile, I feel at peace. I think that laughter is a sign of comfort or rest. Love, however, is not my religion. My God is Love. He is the being that embodies goodness. If all creation is of the creator then creation will not be satisfied until it is granted that from which it came. Immortality is as much craved as it is feared. Is this because we fear God? For those who claim no God, I salute your bold claims regarding your own existence. I too want to feel that my existence is just as it should be, that reality is a fact, and that I lack in nothing so long as I pursue my self. I boldly shout my cogito without choice. I do not know who will hear it. How can I be shouting and not hear myself? That is, I suppose my existence by echo of the shouts. Just so, we become aware of that which is outside of ourselves by supposing constancy of previously observed characteristics within that thing.

My cogito is an effect which demands to know the cause of itself. Asking me to believe in God is like asking me to turn on a light that is already on. I am creation, I have a creator. He can not be easily spotted by the senses. Sense perception is for retrieving that which is outside of ourselves. The being of God is not distinct from me but is rather the best me- a form of myself that I strive to be.

I can exist as an impression-bearer or as nothing. God is the impression. Nothing can defeat God. God can defeat nothing. If I choose not to be his then I also choose not to be my self, which is impossible.

what a ride

looks like i am a blogger these days.

its not that i think every thought i have deserves to be posted and friends need to know my constant stream of thought, but the mind is fascinating and i like the idea of inviting someone into my own.

here are things that i am thinking, and things that are happening, and things that i think relate to me because of who i think i am.

God is good, and i have learned this to be true. when i am myself, i feel closest to God. think about it, He made us in His image (which is pretty rad) so, if i am pursuing passions and trusting rationality- (only to an extent, i struggle with believing rationality since the God i serve may not necessarily be rational) then i am mirroring a Holy God that holds time and all goodness in His hands. its good to have Him around.

more thoughts,

my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer about two weeks ago. shocking? yes. cancer is bad, evil, and foreign to so many. "that really sucks". Yes.

HOWEVER (hold on to your horses, bright thought . . .)

God's timing is supreme; i am unable to experience, do, go, hope, wish, and want without God elbowing Jesus on the side and saying "told ya so". He knows. He just does. So, what does that mean? I claim a love for God, I don't know how to define it, and I can not rationalize it, but it is there and though I mostly crawl through life thinking "what on earth, Lord?" he smiles at me. we are interwoven with His grace through and through. every tear he created, he knows the weight of it and the emotional weight that comes with his plan, but He is willing to carry the burden for my family and I if i am willing to let him. Refreshing.

heh. I am at starbucks reading and i can't stop waving at this little boy all bundled up in his rainy winter gear. presh, totes. (?) jenn is across the table reading. way to go jenn.

ok, i love you.

kambrie